You're doing such a good job

Lol I've been sitting on this for awhile. I am perplexed as to why I didn't post it sooner! Lmbo but let's not question the past shall we!!!!

Being a product of C-PTSD has created in me a bonafide overachieving brat with a

praise kink, and a strong PDA profile( pathological demand avoidance). This is just a fancy way of saying pleasure is a struggle, especially when I dont think I'm doing a good job.

Learning dominatrix has taught me a few things that I have used in my daily life. One of the things that has helped me this week is facing my discomfort of pleasure. This week I started to notice that when things start to go well for me or I feel like I wont be good at something I have the urge to pull away from it by distracting myself with things like doom scrolling on tiktok/random thoughts. This week I put my focus on breathing through the discomfort. Not only has bdsm taught me to breathe through pain, It is also helping to realize I deserve to enjoy the pleasurable parts of life, even if I can't do something on the first try. I am learning and that learning can also be fun even if its not perfect. I challenge myself to think of how much pleasure I would receive from completing a project, putting in effort and learning to slow down to enjoy the moment, not so much on creating the perfect picture.

Over the past few weeks with the help of my self discovery coach I put my focus on accepting that I can accomplish things, that life can feel good and be excited and there is nothing wrong with it. I was utterly surprised by some of the things that came up for me. One of them being that when I feel joy/ pleasure about something I immediately start to feel bad about that pleasure. And now instead of running from the discomfort I simply ask myself 'why'. Loss, lack of consistency in my life, people failing me, me failing myself are a few of the things that came up.

Through learning myself and pouring into the Dom that I am I've realized that bdsm is

less about pushing past and more about creating space for. Learning to breathe, learning to sit

with pleasure, learning to understand when things are surfacing and knowing my power comes from understanding how to deal with whatever comes my way.

So if you are struggling to enjoy life like I am, know that you are not alone, our past does not define our future, we do. Don't forget to breathe through the pleasure baby, you are doing such a good job.

As always thank you so much for making it this far in my journey, you are appreciated ❣️❣️

Like, share, comment, subscribe!!!! If you have any questions, need a reading, have something you would like to share/want me to talk about on my blog or just want to tell me how well I'm doing! Here's a link with all my media's and emails!!!! I'm so excited to hear from you!!

https://linktr.ee/lovesdivinehealing